As [[American Idol (2010 Series)|Season 9]] of [[American Idol (TV Series)|American Idol]] launches, and Simon Cowell chooses this moment to announce his resignation as a judge, we get to check out the first auditions episode.
We’re surprised that the UK is receiving its footage of Idol only one day after the first episode aired in the States. Some 9,000 auditions show up, complete with umbrellas, braving some hideous weather to get themselves on Idol.
[[Simon Cowell|Simon]]’s back (for now), Randy’s back, beautiful Kara is back. And the judging panel is joined by Vickie Adams aka Posh Spice. And she’s – shudder – smiling!
The first auditionee is a goofball – Janet, 26, from Somerville – who appears to be a professional…em…jumper. She almost falls over herself as she runs into the audition room. In an ill-advise naval baring pink top, Janet proceeds to screech her way through a song and mortally offends Kara by calling her Paula.
Simon asks if the window in the room opens, presumably so he can throw himself out of it. Oh, poor woman. Janet’s on a real downer when she comes out of the room, but it doesn’t stop her from calling Kara by the wrong name again!
The next auditionee is 16 year old Maddie Curtis, one of a family with 12 children. Dressed nicely in shorts and tshirt, she opts to sing Hallelujah. A religious girl, then? She draws some polite smiles from the judges. Simon credits her voice with “a bit of soul”, and [[Randy Jackson|Randy]] likes her too.
[[Kara DioGuardi|Kara]] compliments her on singing from her heart, despite being nervous. Maddie receives four yeses from the judges. Randy yells “Welcome to Hollywood!” for the first time this season!
Is Pat preppy or geeky or what? If he says “Holla” one more time in the audition room, I think they’ll kill him. The 17 year old comes into the room and violently butchers Britney’s Womanizer. Oh little man, you are as camp as a field full of tents.
He gets a no from Simon, but Randy delivers a cruel blow – “Dude, I love you, but stop singing forever!” Good advice.
We break for a female-centric line-up of fabulous girl singers who managed to wow the judges. We see a lot of happy ladies dancing around with golden tickets. Apparently only girls received golden ticket in the first half of the day.
We want to take this guy home with us already – or at least get him to take us to his home for dinner! The larger than life fella shows us his massive extended family at dinner. Unusually, he chooses a Muddy Waters song to audition with and shows a gruff, soulful voice. He’s got personality and presence, doesn’t he?
Victoria admires his “huge voice” and his passion. Kara shares some Italian banter with him, while Randy loves Amadeo’s personality. Yes, the judges are raving about him – even Simon compliments his “good energy”. Four yeses, and we’ll be seeing Amadeo in Hollywood (baby).
Self-professed spiritual guy Derek has lots of footage of his blonde locks being blown by a wind machine and him sniffing flowers. He describes himself as sounding like Chris Brown and The Eagles.
And we can officially reveal that Derek…is awful. The smirking judges are proof of that. Simon tells him “that was complete and utter rubbish” and “it was like there were 20 of you in there and every one of them, horrible”.
Cue the footage of people being roundly rejected by the judges. To put this in biblical terms, there is much weeping and gnashing of teeth.
Mere is the next auditionee to face the judges. She’s an anime freak and wants to be a famous singer in Japan – surely there’s a Japan Idol she can sign up for?
Mere yells her way through Take Another Little Piece Of My Heart. Simon calls her singing terrible. She makes the major mistake of arguing with this opinion. Kara interjects and tells her that she can’t work with the show, but Mere is not impressed.
Interesting that she was met at the door by two frelatives, when the initial footage of Mere was standing alone in the audition crowd getting soaked.
Luke Shaffer/Benjamin Bright
A be-hatted Luke gives a fine vocal performance to the judges, followed by Benjamin Bright who’s also well received by the judges. Both walk away with golden tickets to Hollywood.
Slightly psychotic looking contestant Andrew comes along – he’s tired of waiting for hours for his audition. Looks a bit like a drunk Klarke Kent. He gives Mr Cowell a truckload of pissy attitude. When he stops being an ass, he gives a decent rendition of House Of The Rising Sun, which seems to hit the right buttons with the judges.
Kara gives him loads of stick for being so impatient, ending in “so I am now angry with you, who I do not like, at all”. Cowell tells him he has bad energy, and Andrew replies that he was trying to appear confident.
That little bundle of anger storms away with a resounding rejection from the judges – all except for Simon, who was starting to see him as a kindred spirit.
Pretty 21 year old Bostonian Ashley gives the judges a blast of Alicia Keys Some People Want It All. She looks gorgeous, and draws respectful glances from the judges. Kara: “I love your look. That’s a really difficult song to sing, and I think you still brought your own personality to it. I’d like to see you go to Hollywood.”
Simon tells her she may have “it”. Is that the “It Factor”, Simon? Ashley is going to Hollywood!
Drummer Tyler has arrived with two broken wrists and receives a barrage of compliments on his retro look. He sings Let’s Get It On for the judges – he makes all the right moves with the female judges. Kara thinks he’s fantastic and style ‘guru’ VB says his look is great.
For a moment, I thought Tyler was going to be a goofy contestant – anyone else fall into that trap?
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