Welcome to a quick and nasty Big Brother liveblog post – watching the highlights from Day One!
The first ten minutes have been devoted to the housemates going into the house, including [[Mario Mugan]] being given the role of the mole. Hey, that rhymed!
There’s much chatter in the house as the housemates get to know each other. Mario starts making his excuses for wearing a mole outfit, and he does a bit of drooling over the [[Rachael White|Beyonce lookalike]]. But she is gorgeous, so we’ll cut him some slack on that one.
[[John James Parton|John James]] bores [[Ben Duncan|Ben]] with his story of how he came to Big Brother in the UK. He explains that the Australian version of the show was cancelled a couple of years ago. Mario spills some wine. The freaky looking monk wanders past.
Rachael, [[Josie Gibson|Josie]] and [[Govan Zachariah Hinds|Govan]] have a deep intellectual discussion about whether they should shower nude. *fingers crossed*
[[Steve Gill|Steve]] and [[Dave Vaughan|Dave]] have a frank discussion about Steve’s legs and his prosthetics. Dave actually comes across as more grounded than he did in the first night frenzy.
Mario surrounds himself with girls in the bedroom and tells that story about owning the Diary Room chair from the Pete and Nikki year. We’re never gonna get tired of hearing that one, are we viewers?
John James asks if Shabby isn’t actually an offensive word. There are far worse things you can say in the Big Brother house. Oh, he’s mostly sizing up the girls in the house. The horny wallaby. Posh Ben expresses his mother’s reservations about him taking part in the house. Mario confides in Ben that he’s never actually met his father. Can I get an “Awwwwww…”?
Mario is shown his mole hole by Big Brother. The housemates cackle at his misfortune. And the audience at home is having a giggle too.
The housemates do a little circle time thing where they all introduce themselves and say a little bit about themselves. [[Ife Kuku|Ife]] says she believes in The Secret – the power of positive thinking. Steve we already know. Dave talks about his druggie background and how he gets intoxicated by God’s presence. Sunshine says that the reason she’s studying medicine is because her mother died of cancer a couple of years ago.
[[Corin Forshaw|Corin]] says she was made redundant. She tells them about her husband’s death, then about her girlfriend. [[Shabby Katchadourian|Shabby]] introduces herself and talks about the art collective she’s part of, the Obliette. She says she wanted to be a boy. I can see that. Nathan talks about himself, says nothing interesting. Or indeed that I can understand.
Mario talks about how he’s being ‘regenerated’ and says he had his heart broken at Christmas and likes Harry Potter books. Govan talks about living with his grandparents and says he’s trying to find what he wants to do in life. [[Caoimhe Guilfoyle|Caoimhe]] introduces herself, talks about her degrees in French and Spanish. She says she sells stuff on the street.
Josie doesn’t engage us much. Rachael talks about being a black belt in hairdressing. Next is Ben – he waffles about The Arts and his thousands of passions. Talks about how he’s avoided work for so many years and how he gets a lot of work from the Middle East. John James wows us with tales of how he used to build vehicle bodies. And how he comes from Australia. Yawn.
I’ve never seen so many housemates smoking. They’re all puffers. Well, most of them.
The Chest Of Drawers Of Temptation talks to Mario. He has to smuggle a beach ball and a marker into his mole hole and use it to frame one of the other housemates. He’s not allowed to tell anyone else about the Tree.
[[Sunshine Martin|Sunshine]]’s in the Diary Room making enquiries about the chest of drawers in the bathroom. Little does she know.
Ben’s standing in the living room…but where are his trousers? Caoimhe walks in on him and Mario, and she tells them she’s got a boyfriend. That kills off that question, doesn’t it? Mario asks Ben is he’s straight or gay – Ben responds that he’s straight, but not great at relationships.
As some of the housemates settle down to bed, Mario slopes off to set up his beachball. We see him scribbling on the ball. John James is in the diary room, confiding that he thinks Nathan doesn’t like him. Or it could be his monobrow makes him look angry, he admits.
Dave quizzes Mario about how he came to be in costume. Of all the housemates, he looks most suspicious of Mario. Yet, while all the housemates are in the bedroom talking about the mole, Mario is sneaking out trying to place the beach ball. It’s the most inept thing I’ve ever seen. He eventually manoeuvres it into a safe part of the garden so it looks like it was thrown over the wall.
Shabby and Caoimhe discover the ball nearly an hour later. They read out “David most hated” Big Brother intervenes by asking them to being the ball to the diary room. Shabby goes in. BB tells her that they’re in a residential area and they’ll make sure to minimise contact with the outside world. Is she suspicious that it happened on the very first day?
As the housemates ponder the meaning of the ball, the episode ends. Wonder if there’ll be more chatter about this tomorrow?