If you watched Big Brother last night, you’ll have seen Basshunter spooning up to waifish celebrity homewrecker, Katia Ivanova. Within minutes, the sounds of Jonas slurping on the back of Katia’s neck were the only noise in the camera-stuffed BB bedroom. Tonight’s episode opens with Katia doing the walk of shame from Basshunter’s bed to her own in the morning. Her fellow ‘celebs’ heckle her along the way, one of them suggesting that her shorts are on backwards. Vinnie has a good old moan about the noise the couple made last night.
The big question is, will Jonas and Katia morph into a fully-fledged celebrity couple now? Later, Katia tells Nicola that she doesn’t want to lead anyone on. Katia “I just want to do things and not give a shit about people’s feelings…” Jonas skulks around trying to listen to her conversation with Sov and Nicola.
Vinnie toys with Alex
Vinnie quizzes Alex about why he gave The Sun ammunition by telling the world he was a cross-dresser. Vinnie “Some people keep that sort of thing to themselves and not let the newspapers know about it.” Alex denies having done porn, but gets laughed at by the entire room. Reid eventually makes his excuses and leaves the room…
Vinnie says Alex “seems a bit too honest for his own good sometimes”.
We see the housemates hard at work preparing for their variety show. The focus is clearly on Dane and Alex’s rendition of Especially For You. Nicola suggests that they swap parts, with Dane doing the Kylie vocal and Alex doing the Jason part.
Stephanie drags Stephen Baldwin into the toilet to rehearse her stand-up routine while Nicola, Basshunter and Katia practice their dance routine in the living room. During a spot of down-time, Jonas and Katia chat and he tells her not to think too hard about things. Like there was any chance of that!
Lady Sovereign tramps around the house in an epic teenage strop when she sees the hideous costume Big Brother has given her. To make up for it, Big Bro brings Sov to the Diary Room and tells her that she is going to properly vanish during her routine tonight, which makes the mardy rapper crack a smile.
It was great to see the routine where Ivana Trump entered the house again – the look on Sisqo’s face was virtually priceless. And the looks on the housemates faces as they think Sov has been traded for Trump – they believe Lady Sovereign has been voted off and replaced!
To their immense relief, Sov bursts into the bedroom with a bottle (or two?) of champaigne, introduces herself to the new housemate and about a minute later clicks how Ivana got into the house – “Oh, she came in through the box! I didn’t know that part!” How endearingly simple!
Baldwin goes to the Diary Room to seek protection from Ivana becoming horny in her sleep and molesting one of the lads. Sorry, he’s worried she might molest him. In the kitchen, Alex, Nicola and Vinnie speculate on whether he’s really scared she might jump his bones while he’s sleeping.
We pause for some suitcase porn as the housemates talk enviously about Ivana’s case. Vinnie takes a perfect opportunity to tell Alex his belt is a cheap imitation, probably bought from a “lookie lookie man”.
Meanwhile, Ivana is attempting to explain her haggling with Big Brother for a mosquito net. She calls it a “princess thing”. There’s some kind of ‘thing’ between Heidi and Ivana – Heidi refers to her as ‘fancy lady’. Later on, Heidi talks about mushing laxaties into Ivana’s drink…nasty!
And as we all wind down after a busy day, Jonas and Katia slip into bed with each other again. Do I feel the thrill of a magazine deal blossoming under those covers? I think so. Bible Baldwin reminds them both that they’re being filmed – which they’re clearly aware of. It’ll be interesting to watch this little romance play out on TV…