Junior Apprentice: I don’t know much about art, but…

If tonight’s Junior Apprentice was an episode of Friends, it would be The One With The Yuppie Art Saleskids. Our entrepreneurial schoolkids are summoned to the David Beckham Academy…to spot a “different type of talent”, artists.

This is the classic Apprentice task – give the contestants an armload of artwork and ask them to flog it all. Tim, with his freshly tonged hair is given the role of team leader. On the other team, Emma is the leader, but Zoe has parents who are both art teachers. Expertise on hand, then.

Tim wastes no time in downgrading Hannah to the role of his secretary. Offensive much? I don’t think any of the contestants are doing well tonight. They’re floundering to identify with the artworks, with the exception of Zoe, who’s schmoozing with the artists, giving her parents’ arty backgrounds. But she’s not bothered about negotiations on price.

What’s getting to me is that they’re researching the artists, but they’re not actually spending much time on what’s popular or what’s likely to sell. So they’re ultimately going to be working on their personal preferences.

Tim on one team, and Zoe on the other, are busily trying to invite buyers to their various shows. It looks like they’re both having a hard time convincing people to come down for a viewing. Kirsty’s getting a little irate about Hannah’s indecisiveness. Hannah gets sent out to distribute leaflets rather than anything more high-level. This’ll bite her in the boardroom.

Meanwhile, Zoe has to deal with a disgruntled artist when he turns up to find his artwork not professionally laid out. In fact, back at Tim’s shop, his artists are unimpressed at their lackadaisical approach to labelling their works. Kirsty hangs back when it comes to sales, but the efforts of Tim and Hannah leave a lot to be desired. “I love to just look at them too,” simpers Hannah. “Blue’s my favourite colour too…”

A very upset Emma is annoyed with Zoe for dominating the task and not allowing the others to speak to the clients. Arjun agrees. He’s been quite low-key this week, hasn’t he?

Note to Tim: Anthony Hopkins is not known as a famous artist.

Fair play to the sheep-shearing team leader, Tim closes a big money sale in the last seconds of the task. Meanwhile, a delusional Zoe doesn’t see any possible reason why her fellow team members would have a bad word to say about her…

What starts out as a fairly cordial board room meeting, quickly descends into the expected levels of finger-pointing on Emma’s team. Emma’s team closed over £6,000 worth of sales while Tim’s team sold roughly £2,200 worth of art. So, regardless of how bossy Zoe appears to be, you could say that her drive propelled the team to success. The Revolution team win bespoke outfits from a well-known tailor.

Chewing over their defeat, Tim’s team cleverly work out that they failed because they didn’t make enough sales. Might it have had something to do with their lazy approach to sales. Kirsty on that team is organised and ambitious, but Tim and Hannah are both incredibly un-motivated. Nick implies that they could have achieved the sales if they’d appealed to the passing trade in Brick Lane.

Kirsty gets a roasting for failing to secure Tom Lewis’s business. Hannah is in the firing line for being subservient to Tim. Sugar privately admits that Tim always manages to deflect the blame from himself. At the end of the process, Hannah is the one to get fired. Lord Sugar tells her that she looks good on paper, but her practical application of her skills is non-existent. I could also have happily seen Tim Ankers being sent home – I don’t rate him as an entrepreneur.

Good episode this week, and my respect for these kids is quite high. It can’t be easy to sell to a market as niche and difficult as art. Well done.

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