Single Review: Nadine – ‘Insatiable’

Oh my… this is all a bit 2004, isn’t it?

Not that you can’t admire Nadine’s determination; clearly one of the more talented Aloud girls and she was meandering about, looking for a recording contract for months while Cheryl (clearly not one of the more talented Aloud girls) shone like a HUGE beacon in the crowd of a thousand mini-candles. Not that she deserved to shine that bright: she was keeping neighbours awake with her careless shining; someone should’ve unplugged her. Stupid thing.

Finally landing a record contract, and finally promising an album, and finally things are on the up and BAM: ‘The Sun’ call Nadine “the b***h among the girls”, and ‘The Mirror’ say “she’s grown further apart from the other girls”. Even if it’s true, this is hardly the kind of advertisement she was hoping for. Furthermore, a lot of people are complaining Nadine is the reason Girls Aloud haven’t got back together yet. And plenty of haters and fans alike weren’t too pleased with the idea of Nadine’s album being exclusive to Tesco. Some even went as far as inventing their own song titles that would be “most suited for the album”, which include the sexually provocative ‘Unexpected Item In My Bagging Area’, the 80’s-influenced ‘When Will My Wobbly Trolley Wheel Stop Wobbling?’, and the doo-wop styled ‘Hey, Who Moved The Fucking Beans Again?’.

However, I preferred to look at it another way: she was guaranteed BAGS of promotion (hey… see what I did there? I’m so talented!) and there’d be lots of money piled onto her songs and videos, which meant there’d be lots of things to add to the list of lots of things I can already list about why Cheryl is good but not quite as good as Nadine, despite the fact I hate them both.

Isn’t this fun!?

Clearly undeterred, Nadine has stormed forward with the release of début single ‘Insatiable’. Aaaaand that’s where the good bit ends. ‘Insatiable’ sounds like it could’ve come straight off an early Girls Aloud album like ‘Sound Of The Underground’ or even ‘What Will The Neighbours Say?’ with a half-baked attempt to jazz things up, an anaemic synth and a couple of brass tooters. ‘Insatiable’s dated production lends it no favours and the mix of live and electronic instrumentation rarely ever works, and ‘Insatiable’ isn’t one of those times where it does. Those spitzy, electronic hand claps that is so fond of; the ones that stutter their way through all his songs song stick out like a sore thumb and lose any soul the song has.

So whilst the wheels aren’t exactly falling off the Nadine’s Solo Project Bus, I’d say there was a decent slashed tire, (Cheryl, maybe?) especially when you realise the biggest hook in the song is “It’s like WOAH!”. Oh, and then there’s that video:

Well, so much for the huge dosh being spent on every aspect of her pop career! You really would’ve thought Tesco might delve a little deeper into their pockets for something like this, wouldn’t you? I was half expecting a big, red Tesco Value circle to ping up half-way through the video saying how much it cost*.

1:27… Oof… Bad lip-synching Nadine.

As a début single, it serves it’s purpose – shows off the face so everyone remembers her as “the one from Girls Aloud that’s stopping the group getting back together”, it’s reasonably catchy, establishes her own “sound”, and shows of a decent bit a thigh. And don’t get me wrong – compared to Cheryl’s ‘Promise This’, this is like HURTS’ new album has come early, but when you look at would could’ve been done, and what actually was done, it’s a little more than disheartening to see Tesco have such little faith in Nadine.


Rating: 2.5 STARS

Download: November 1, 2010

Featured Album: ‘Insatiable’

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1 Comment

  1. Gerard McGarry

    …she didn’t hire Flo Rida to do a rap!

    No, you’ve hit the nail on the head with your review. I think it’s fair to say that Nadine is the strongest vocalist in Girls Aloud. Unfortunately, she’s also by far the least likable of them all. 

    The funniest thing about this whole solo single thing is that the tabloid journos I follow on Twitter were raving about the song, but then their papers went and published a lot of stuff about her holding back Girls Aloud and being distant with them (or was it that none of them liked her or invited her to anything?). Nevermind, in the market that Nadine is playing to, likeability is an important factor.

    What I often wonder about with Nadine though – would Girls Aloud fans miss her if she didn’t return when the group gets back together?

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