Single Review: Pixie Lott ft. Pusha T – ‘What Do You Take Me For?’

“There’s little to indeed, “take”, from the gruelling experience of enduring this song”

1 STAR

Digital Release: November 6, 2011

Physical Release: N/A

When Pixie Lott first presented herself to us for the imperative pop examination all new artists undergo, she was happy enough rolling around under some angelic white bed sheets, only to wind up in a pink-lit night-club and performing an elaborate hand-clapping, touchy-feely routine with a guy who ended up getting slapped. But at least you believed that she believed she was only having a bit of fun, being young, fresh and wide-eyed and that. There is no precise moment in time where Pixie Lott ceased to being simply a slightly milquetoast, modest little innuendo merchant with a disarming grin and decided to start physically enacting said innuendos (and then some). But whilst there is no way of pin-pointing the exact moment where she suddenly thought donning minimal leather, a greasy-looking bob cut and killer heels would be some sort of good look, the transition between the mature-minded summery pop whimsy of ‘Turn It Up’ and the returning track for this new era, ‘All About Tonight’, a tellingly sheepish move that saw her flock to the popular trend and ditch any of the playful New Girl On The Block look she possessed.

The same piggy-backing electropop is dished out on ‘What Do You Take Me For?’. Not that the song itself has much of it’s own merits, but Pixie pretty much tramples it further into the ground with her painful falsetto; one day she’ll learn that she doesn’t actually have one and stick to a register lower than a church steeple. The song chugs through a fancy hi-gloss explosion of sound, too bumptious to purvey any real melody as much of it is drowned out by it’s loudness and then rained over by Pixie, who’s busy making some indecipherable muttering about something or other but then boldly questioning, twice – “What do you take me for?/What do you take me for?”. Not much, as there’s little to indeed, “take”, from the gruelling experience of enduring this song. Usually there’s some kind of redeeming factor in songs like these; a trivial little ray of light that only a pedant would care for under normal circumstances. ‘What Do You Take Me For?’ is no normal circumstance by any means, and it sticks stubbornly regimented to drearily familiar musical ground and rests most of its merit on year-old tricks of the trade (rent-o-rapper, synthesised horn section, name-checking). Upon this basic outer-shell that’s as typical of most of the Top 40 fodder, we’re given the odious attempt at a brass section – probably synthesised (because on budget land, budget brass = budget sexy) – washed down with a vocal chord stuck on an evil puppeteer’s string, and the puppeteer sees fit to yank Pixie’s vocal melody out of her range at seemingly random intervals, giving the impression not even she is in control of her voice.

 

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