The Brit Awards 2011 – Award Show coverage…live!

Welcome, welcome, welcome…to Shout’s live coverage of the 2011 Brit Awards. We won’t waffle on here – let’s get down to business… 

Oh, here’s our complete list of the Brit Awards 2011 winners!

Take That open The Brits

Flanked by an army of shield-weilding guards, the fab five take the stage to open the show. Sadly, Mark Owen’s bleating vocal is made worse by obvious nerves. I haven’t heard Kidz before, but it’s a tad uncharacteristic for Take That – a stomping electro-glam number that’s a bit of a mess if I’m honest. This isn’t the fivesome at their best.

The stage production is overblown – is this what they tried to do at the X Factor last year? It culminates in the backing dancers getting naked.

James Corden comes on…

Are we going to get a poor man’s Ricky Gervais? Nope. No celebrities egos were harmed during Corden’s intro speech. And he doesn’t waste any time either, it’s straight into…

Best British Male Solo Artist

Presented by the awesome Dizzee Rascal, who won this award last year, the nominees for the award are:

  1. Paul Weller
  2. Plan B
  3. Mark Ronson
  4. Tinie Tempah
  5. Robert Plant

And the winner is: Plan B

Plan B hits the stage and fanks all his friends, managers and publicists. Etc. Uninspiring. Robert Plant was robbed, I tell you!

Adele performs Someone Like You

One of my absolute favourite singers at the moment, Adele takes the stage for a smoky ballad, Someone Like You. It’s a simple piano ballad, but Adele is showing off her amazingly soulful voice. Beautiful. She looks a little emotional at the end of the song – but as James Corden said, “you can have all the dancers, pyrotechnics, etc, but when you sound like that, all you need is a piano.”

Best British Breakthrough Act

Introduced by Fearne Cotton, here are the nominees:

  1. Rumer
  2. The XX
  3. Mumford & Sons
  4. Ellie Goulding
  5. Tinie Tempah

And the winner is: Tinie Tempah

Tinie seems really pleased to have won this, despite being the most nominated person on the show tonight. He was virtually guaranteed to win something! But well deserved, Mr Tempah.

Best International Album

Introduced by Boris Becker, the nominees are:

  1. Arcade Fire – The Suburbs
  2. Kings Of Leon – Come Around Sundown
  3. Cee Lo Green – The Lady Killer
  4. Eminem – Recovery
  5. Katy Perry – Teenage Dream

And the winner is: Arcade Fire – The Suburbs 

Quirky thank you speech from (presumably) the Arcade Fire frontman – they’ve obviously picked up on the fact that not many people know who they are because they ask people to Google them.

Rihanna performs Only Girl In The World

If only Rihanna sang live as easily as she can look red hot. She’s decked out in a flowing red cape, but screeches her way through the first few lines of the song. She reappears in black…underwear? And the song switches to S&M. The medley continues with What’s My Name, and at this point the vocals are back on form. Oh, the cameraman did gusset-cam from the bottom of the stage. Wasn’t expecting that.

Fair play to her for performing live though – there was no faking those bum notes! Brilliant routine!

Critics’ Choice Award

Presented by Ellie Goulding and Mark Ronson, we get a glimpse at the previous winners – Ellie Goulding herself and Adele.

This year, as you already know, the winner is Jesse J. Fabulous! We love Jesse J on Shout – congratulations! Jesse accepts the award and says she remembers being in the Brits audience one year trying to get attention from record company types! She thanks everybody…even the people who watched her sing in her pyjamas on YouTube.

Mumford & Sons perform

I’m already a little tired of having Mumford & Sons thrust down my throat tonight! Who are these guys? Some kind of Welsh country music vocal quartet? I’m not against this type of music, I love acoustic music in all forms, but whatever they’re performing is dismal. Boring.

Best International Male Solo Artist

Introduced by the non-autotuned Jason Derulo, here are the nominees:

  • Bruce Springsteen
  • Cee Lo Green
  • David Guetta
  • Eminem
  • Kanye West

And the winner is: Cee Lo Green 

Really? One good song and that’s it? He charismatically thanks all his backroom boys and everybody who voted for him. And he seems overwhelmed by meeting Boy George! Weird!

Best British Single

The award for Best British Single is presented by Alan Carr, and the nominees are:

  • Alexandra Burke ft Pitbull – All Night Long
  • Cheryl Cole – Parachute
  • Florence & The Machine – You’ve Got The Love
  • Matt Cardle – When We Collide
  • Olly Murs – Please Don’t Let Me Go
  • Plan B – She Said
  • Scouting For Girls – This Ain’t A Love Song
  • Taio Cruz – Dynamite
  • Tinie Tempah – Pass Out
  • The Wanted – All Time Low

And the winner is: Tinie Tempah 

Tinie refuses to give his acceptance speech without his co-conspirator Labrinth – but he had to as Labrinth was nowhere to be found! 

Best International Group

Duran Duran stars Simon Le Bon and John Taylor present the Best International Group award – and they even namecheck Northern Ireland…

  1. Vampire Weekend
  2. Arcade Fire
  3. Kings Of Leon
  4. The Script
  5. Black Eyed Peas

And the winner is: Arcade Fire 

This time round, the band thank their families and partners for their support and also give a plug for a charity in Haiti. Nice one. If I remember what the charity was called, I’ll update this!

Plan B performs

The ludicrously named Plan B performs his big hit, She Said with a set that’s remarkably similar to the video. A cast of thousands has an impromptu riot. This guy has a fantastic voice – wow, and a riot cop runs across the stage ON FIRE! Good show!

Best International Breakthrough Act

Avril Lavigne and Will Young present this award, but the minute Bieber’s name is mentioned, it’s clear who’s going to win…

  1. The Temper Trap
  2. The National
  3. Bruno Mars
  4. Justin Bieber
  5. The Glee Cast

And the winner is: Justin Bieber

Justin thanks his international rep “Mike” and fellow Canadian Avril Lavigne. Quite patriotic of him, I’d say.

Best British Female Solo Artist

Presented by the irrepressible Boy George, here are the nominees:

  1. Rumer
  2. Laura Marling
  3. Cheryl Cole
  4. Ellie Goulding
  5. Paloma Faith

And the winner is: Laura Marling 

Arcade Fire perform

About time too. Betcha everyone else has been wondering what this much-hyped band would sound like. And the answer is…yeah, they’re pretty good. Two drummers – that’s interesting, it’s like that Phil Collins video in the 80’s. I can feel myself being compelled to buy their album – Arcade Fire, they’re worth a listen, folks.

Best International Female Solo Artist

Cheryl Cole’s presenting this one. Nominees are…

  1. Rihanna
  2. Katy Perry
  3. Kylie Minogue
  4. Robyn
  5. Alicia Keys

And the winner is: Rihanna 

Rihanna accepts her award in a wonderful white dress with red flowers. She thanks everybody, but lies by saying “It doesn’t get much bigger than the Brits”. Love her. 

Tinie Tempah and Eric Turner perform Written In The Stars

Tinie finally gets to perform a much rocked-up version of Written In The Stars, one of his best tunes, in my opinion. He segues into Frisky with a brilliant laser light show. And then Pass Out. Labrinth finally made it out of the toilets then. Awesome stuff. Big hit of the night, I’d say!

Best British Group

Ah, the wonderful Dermot O’Leary danders up to the stage to present the next award and sadly his professionalism eclipses James Corden for a moment…

  1. The XX
  2. Gorillaz
  3. Mumford & Sons
  4. Take That
  5. Biffy Clyro

And the winner is: Take That 

A suddenly bashful Take That can’t even come up with a decent acceptance speech. Robbie says “Shabba”, Mark Owen thanks Robbie for coming back (for good). Woeful.

Best British Album

Roger Daltry comes out to present this next award. Just to update you, the nominees are:

  1. The XX – XX
  2. Mumford & Sons – Sigh No More
  3. Plan B – The Defamation Of Strickland Banks
  4. Tinie Tempah – Disc-overy
  5. Take That – Progress

And the winner is: Mumford & Sons – Sigh No More 

The band seem a bit confused by the win and have to be hurried along by James Corden. 

Cee Lo Green plays the show out

Cee Lo closes the show with a big production of Forget You. We were hoping for the original version (complete with swearwords) but they played it safe. He’s joined onstage by Paloma Faith and that’s where things take a cheesy turn (she sings “Welcome to Britain, Cee Lo” at him) and fails to harmonize with him properly. Ah well. 

That’s yer lot, people. Don’t forget to get the condensed Brits results post here.

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