True Blood Episode S3.02 Review – “Beautifully Broken”

Previously on True Blood:

Bill got kidnapped by a bunch of thugs, known as The Fuck You Crew, who sliced him open and drank blood from him. Bill managed to escape the Fuck You Crew by overturning the car and running into the woods. After a good night’s sleep in the dirt, Bill woke up crawled out of his grave, found that there was no-one to have sex with (bummer!) and preyed on a little old lady with health problems. After taking a little drink from this lady Oliva, Bill found out that he was in Mississippi, glamoured the woman and gave her a few dollars for her trouble. Bill ran out into the night, only to be surrounded by a bunch of abnormally large wolves with orange glowing eyes. Bill warned them that he “had fed”. Bill, wolves can’t understand you! Stupid vampire. Bill bared his fangs and the episode ended.

Meanwhile, Sookie searched frantically for her 175 year old lover but was only met with frustration as the extremely capable Bon Temps police didn’t take the news of a missing dead person very seriously. Sookie got pissed and ran around annoying Jessica, Eric and Bud for the majority of the episode. Until of course, she discovered vampire makers can telepathically contact their children and so she tracked Jessica, got her to act on the hunch Bill sent her and the two ladies found Bill’s overturned car in the woods with a dead man inside. He had a symbolised mark on his shoulder. Jessica conveniently just happened to have the symbol on her phone and found it stood for ‘Operation Werewolf’? Could Bill have been kidnapped by werewolves? *dun dun dun*

Jessica has her own shit to worry about though. Not only are things not right between her and Hoyt but she also has a dead human body under her house. Guess Jessica planned on a wild weekend while her stuffy ‘father’ Bill was away/

In other news, Tara tried to kill herself. Lafayette struggled to knock down his bathroom door, where Tara was swallowing down pills, despite having consumed Eric’s strength enhancing blood only a few days ago. Lettie Mae continued to be annoying.

Jason threw shit around for a good deal of the last episode, after shooting Eggs in the head while Andy took the credit blame. Andy told him to get back to his promiscuous ways. Jason did quite successfully, engaging in a threesome but failed to get it up due to the minor problem in seeing bullet holes in the two ladies heads.

Oh, Hoyt moved in and got himself a badass haircut! Power to you!

Meanwhile the vampires are in a bit of strife. Following a marathon sex session with his suspicious Estonian lapdancer Yvetta, Eric spent a lot of the last episode yelling into a headset and getting his balls squashed by sexy ginger Sophie Anne. Apparently, Sophie Anne and Eric are under suspicion of selling ‘sacred’ vampire blood. It’s Sophie Anne’s fault but something tells me she’d have no qualms about daubing Eric in in her place. The Queen is broke y’see? Despite being 500 years old, the Queen is too cool to put money in investments and desperately needs to sell the much desired and very fashionable new street drug.

Oh and Arlene is pregnant with either Terry or Rene/Drew Marshall’s baby and Pam rocked last episode…with an onslaught of scene stealing one liners, having an expanded role but not doing much else.

And that’s what you missed on True Blood.

The Plot:

It was another jam packed plot this week in True Blood. Once again, we were introduced to the continued storylines of many familiar faces but we also got to meets some new faces in the shape of a deceptively evil vampire king of Missisippi Russell Edgington and his camp vampire boyfriend Talbot. We also met a shifty vampire named Franklin Mott, Sam’s trashy family – his mother Melinda and his father Joe Lee, and the mysterious community of Hotshot which appears to be filled with a bunch of crooked weirdos. I think the best way to write this review would be to split the story into sections since there’s so many storylines going on at once.


I liked Sookie a little better this episode. In the last one she just annoyed me with her constant fretting over Bill but in this episode we got to see the emotional side to Sookie. The scenes with Eric, Jason and Terry were all really sweet and heartwarming and Anna Paquin did a good job of acting. I particularly liked her Bill impression of “Sookeh” and you can definitely see her and Eric getting closer. For one thing, she seems able to tolerate him when she coolly exclaimed last year that she’d “prefer cancer” to Eric.

I’m also enjoying the more spunkier, independent side we’re seeing to Sookie so far last season. Its more in tune with the character of the book and it’s great to see Sookie actually grab the reins for once and not run around in circles screaming “Beehl! Beehl! Beehl! Come save me!”

As far as plot goes, Sookie learned a little more about werewolves and the ones who had kidnapped Bill. Apparently they are involved with the Nazis and a particularly creepy werewolf watched her from outside Merlottes before herself and Terry chased it out into the woods, only for it to turn into a wolf and hide.

The episode ended with Sookie and Eric sitting on the porch of chez Stackhouse, talking about Eric’s previous involvement with fighting werewolves and simmering in the hot sexual tension, when suddenly Eric ordered Sookie to “invite me in”. Sookie claimed very demurely “Won’t you please come in, Mr. Northman” which allowed Mr. Northman to bare his fangs at one of those damn glowy eyed wolves again. Sookie takes a pistol and shoots it. End of episode.


I’ve mainly discussed Eric’s plotline in the Sookie section above but there was a few interesting flashbacks involving him. Apparently himself and Godric (who it was great to see again) were involved in hunting Nazis, more specifically Nazi werewolves. There’s still a lot more to be uncovered, which will probably revealled in future flashbacks, but apparently the Were-bitch that Eric and Godric held captive is working for a felllow vampire. I’m going to guess…that maybe it’s Russell.


Speaking of Russell, the vampire king of Mississippi, he had ordered the kidnap of Bill. Denis O’Hare was excellent in the role of Russell Edgington – appearing to be the true gentleman but with a viciously vile streak in him. His shooting of Coot’s werewolf friend showed a certain coldness and he seems to be much more of a threat than the only other vampire royalty we met, Sophie Anne. Yes apparently, Russell wants to marry Sophie Anne so he can take over Louisiana and Mississipi. Hmmm, we appear to be foreshadowing Books #6 and #8 here. No doubt, Russell will have many sides to him and I can’t wait to uncover the many dimensions to his character…he is definitely more three dimensional than previous Big Bads René and Maryann.

Credit also needs to be given to Theo Alexander who plays flamboyant boyfriend of the king Talbot. His creative vampire gourmet was a hoot and I’m sure we’ll get many more hilarious one-liners from him. There seems to be a bit of friction between him and Russell though.

Bill was quiet for most of this episode. Probably shame faced at the fact that his intentions for moving to Bon Temps mightn’t be just so he could mainstream. And also, Bill had a slight hissy fit at meeting his maker Lorena, dressed in her best riding gear, and threw an oil lamp at her. This effectively set her on fire and fire can actually KILL vampires.

I’m sure Lorena will survive though. There’s no way Bill’s getting rid of her that easily and I also found the sequence really surreal. Perhaps, it was a dream or his imagination or something. There’s no excuse for domestic violence.

Tara and Lafayette:

After last week’s nail biting episode, could Lafayette break down the door in time to save Tara from ending her life? Yes, he could. Laffy made Tara puke up them pills and gave Lettie Mae a good tongue lashing while he was at it. I actually felt a little sorry for Lettie Mae at this stage. If she disappears for a few more episodes, I may be able to tolerate her again.

Lafayette was great as always and surprisingly Tara made me fall in love with her again, regaining some of her spunk. There wasn’t as much crying and we definitely saw some of the old feisty Tara again. Rutina Wesley, for me, is the only character in the show that rarely descends into parody so its always a joy to see her light up the screen when there’s a nice mixture of vulnerability and feistiness.

Lafayette took Tara to see his crazy mother Ruby Jean, who was played brilliantly by Alfre Woodard (who actually played Mehcad Brooks [Eggs] mother in the second season of Desperate Housewives. There’s six degrees of separation for ya!). Ruby Jean is intensely homophobic and mean and it allowed us a more in-depth look at Lafayette’s background. It looks like love may be on the cards though for eveyone’s favourite drug dealer as I believe I detected a spark between himself and his mother’s orderly Jesus (pronounced Heh-suse). Jesus and I agreed to see other people but that doesn’t mean we don’t talk from time to time.

Tara has also developed a spark with a vampire named Franklin Mott. The guy’s shifty and Tara’s a vampire phobe but she doesn’t care about being discriminatory when Franklin holds down a bunch of redneck racists so she can knock the crap out of them. You go girl!


Sam finally met the rest of his family – his mother Melinda and his father Joe Lee. The parents welcomed him back with open arms and much sentimentality and all…but judging by their trashy appearances and crude mouths, there’s a lot more too them than meets the eye. It’s clear that Sam’s brother Tommy is a little shit though. The scarred young man “who got in a lot of fights” shifts into his “go to animal” of pitbull while Sam turns into his trademark collie. Tommy ran out onto the road in pitbull form, beckoning Sam forward, Sam ran towards his little brother right in front of a truck while the mischevious little pitbull transformed into a bird and flew away. It’s Sam’s own fault for running out on the road but Tommy’s a unlikeable prat so far.


Jason and Andy continue to crack me up. There whole unlikely father-son/brother-brother interaction is a joy to watch and its fun to see Jason get all annoyed while Andy plays the hero, for killin’ the murderer. It appears Jason’s storyline is about to truly kick off now. Travelling in the cop car, intoxicated with (a sober) Andy, to stop a drug raid in Hotshot, Jason encounters a hauntingly beautiful blonde woman in the woods. Why is she walking like a hunchback though? Is she inbred…or something more! Jason manages to pin down one of the drug dealers of Hotshot which I think proves my theory right about Jason becoming a cop, something I touted as a prediction for last week.

I look forward to seeing how the Hotshot community plays out on screen. We only got glimpses of it in the book but has to be one of my favourite subplots and can’t wait to see it developed more in the show.


Poor old Jessica is being forced to grow up. Not only has she come to the realisation that deodorant is not going to fix the dead body beneath the rafters but she’s had to break up with Hoyt too because she’s not human enough. The scenes between Hoyt and Jessica were performed brilliantly by Jim Parrack and Deborah Ann Woll and I’m sure many will bat a tear at Bon Temps former golden couple appearing doomed.

It wasn’t all doom and gloom though. Pam and Jessica’s short interaction proved fun and Jessica renting out a chainsaw is such a typical desperate teenage thing to do. Looks like Jessica will have to use the chainsaw for cutting wood though because the truck driver’s body has mysteriously disappeared. Could the mysterious intruder to the Compton household be the one to remove the body?

Arlene and Terry:

There wasn’t much progression in these guys stories but they appear to have replaced Hoyt and Jessica as the new cutest couple in Bon Temps. Now hopefully Arlene’s baby isn’t the child of cold blooded killer René.

The Verdict:

Brilliant! The show was on top form last night – containing all the ingredients that makes True Blood great. Satiric humour and dry wit, engaging plotlines, relatable characters, genuine does of emotion, lots of intrigue, a bit of sleaze and raunchiness and of course – the supernatural. It was a great episode and has me cursing the wait for another week ’til True Blood. I, once again, need to applaud the special effects and production design. Russell’s house looked sublime and I love how we’re seeing the shapeshifters and Weres transform into animals more. It was shown rarely in the last two seasons but due to the show’s phenomenal popularity now – they can really go all out. I really get a kick out of the shapeshifting.

My conspiracy theories and predictions:


  • The truck driver Jessica killed had a wallet of him and his young son. I have a feeling that the son may just be Sookie’s first cousin-once removed and son of Hadley – Hunter Savoy. Don’t ask me why, I just think its a hunch and will come back and bite Jessica in the ass. Hunter doesn’t appear until the eighth book though so I’m most likely wrong.
  • Godric will make more appearances in flashbacks.
  • Gran might possibly appear in flashbacks.
  • Sophie Anne is aware of Russell’s evil plans and may even possibly be in cahoots with him.
  • Franklin will have some of the characteristics of slimy vampire Mickey in Book #5.
  • The V drinking weres will have some connection to the V drinking were-witches of Book #4.
  • The drug dealer will turn out to be Felton Norris – a not so nice guy who gets his revenge on Jason in the books.
  • Russell will kill Sophie Anne, if he’s not working with her.
  • Tommy, being involved in lots of fights and having a go-to shift as a “pit” bull terrier might tie in with the Quinn storyline from Book #5. Both fought in the pits and Tommy will probably be involved with introducing Sam and Sookie to Quinn.



  • Fuck You Crew Member: S3.01 – S3.02 R.I.P.
  • Soldier: S3.02 R.I.P.
  • Were-Bitch S3.02 R.I.P.

Oh How Offensive!:

The episode was clean-ish enough. As clean as it gets for True Blood. Okay, Lorena was lit on fire and Bill ripping off the werewolves ear wasn’t particularly nice to look at but there have been worse scenes in True Blood. As expected, the shapeshifters and weres get naked so expect to see a sneaky ass or pair of boobs.

Quotes From The Episode:

Lafayette: You to busy prasin’ Jesus when your daughter is about to move in with him permanently.


Pam: You feel it in the heartbeat.

Jessica: Yeah?

Pam: (impatiently) And when it slows, you stop!

Jessica: Yeah but HOW do you stop?

Pam: I think of crying children with soggy diapers! Also maggots!


Eric: (when Sookie starts crying) Please don’t do that! It makes me feel…disturbingly human.


Hoyt: (to Jessica) You can control yourself (from biting people). It would like me biting people with hamburgers round their necks.


Jason: There’s werewolves?

Sookie: Yep.

Jason: Shit! Bigfoot, is he real too?

Sookie: I guess it’s possible.

Jason: Santa?

Sookie: Jason, focus!


Sookie: I keep expecting Bill to come through the door and say (imitates Bill’s voice) “Sookeh!”


Tommy: Don’t move. Get outta the car!

Sam: Which is it? Don’t move or get outta the car?


Sookie: Did you see anyone there?

Terry: No. Normally when I see things that others don’t see it’s ‘cause I haven’t taken my medication.


Jason: Are all these reporters here for you killin’ Eggs?

Andy: No, it’s because I won the Miss America pageant. I thought I told you to lay low.


Terry: (hands Sookie gun) You know how to use one of these?

Sookie: I ain’t that blonde!

Terry: I’ve always liked you…and…I’d miss you if you got killed.


Lafayette: You pull another stunt like that shit last night and I’ll make sure you get a room right next to Ruby Jean and I’ll make sure the motherfucker spoonfeeding you won’t be half as hot… as Jesus! You feelin’ me?


Sam: I didn’t realise this was a “Who’s life is more fucked contest?” If it means that much to you, you win!


Talbot: Chilled carbonated blood. Cruelty free, all willingly donated.


Talbot: Excuse me, gentlemen! I need to drain the second course. (calls) Carlo! Bring me that Thai boy!

Andy: You have a good heart, Jason. You’re…eh…prettier than most girls.       

Jason: I love you Andy, you’re my best friend.                                                        Andy: Well, that’s just sad!

Sookie: Eric! You can’t just leave!                                                                               

Eric: Oh I’m not leaving! You’re going to invite me in…to protect you…or have passionate primal sex with you! How about both?

Talbot: (Sophie Anne’s) as mad as a monk in a triad…and has been for centuries!

Terry: Ten reasons why I can look after you’re kids. Number 1, I’m a nurturer. I once found a baby armadillo on the road and I nursed it and now it sleeps under my bed. Number 2, I have a diploma in anger management where I learned talkin’ about your feelings is a manly thing to do. Number 3…(Arlene runs off to get sick)(Terry walks to bathroom door)…NUMBER 3! I NEVER KILLED NOTHIN’ BY ACCIDENT! NUMBER 4…

Franklin: Are you the waitress?                                                                                  Tara: I’m a bartender…and I’m not working tonight.                                           Franklin: What are you doing so?                                                                             Tara: Honestly, I’m trying not to kill myself.                                                       Franklin: How’s that working out for you?                                                               Tara: I’m still alive, amn’t I?                                                                                 Franklin: That makes one of us.

Jason: (gets in Andy’s police car) I ain’t ever been in the front seat before.

Andy: This is my town, Kenya and whatever happens in my town…concerns me!  Kenya: Quit speechifying Andy! There’s no TV cameras around you damn fool!    Kevin: You sure did sound smart on the TV, Andy!

Eric: To bluh bluh bluh ‘til death do you part!




1 Comment

  1. Gerard McGarry

    Can’t believe we published our reviews within an hour of each other – what were the chances of that happening? I’ll drop you a proper comment in the morning, but it’s past my bedtime!

    I will leave you with that beautiful moment where Sookie does a spot-on impersonation of Bill saying her name. That was hilarious!

Log In or Sign Up

Skip to toolbar